Eight months!!!!

Today is exactly 8 mths since my darling left me alone in this world. I was watching a show about the sufferings of a cancer patient last night and the memories of Paul came pouring on me so strongly again... I can never forget his last couple of weeks in this world; his pain, his agony for not being able to go downstairs to the family and living room to watch tv and mingle with 105ians, he was desperate for oxygen almost all the time and despite having two oxygen concentrator in our bedroom, he was always grasping for more oxygen.... the amount of morphine and dormicum he had, the injections, etc etc etc

Though God did not choose to heal him for reasons which i will and can never understand despite so much prayers but i choose to believe in the Almighty as He knows what's best for His children, I am thankful that just couple of days before Paul passed on, he finally found peace within him as I could tell the huge transformations in him; he used to be the one crying almost everyday asking "why" but just days before he passed on, he was so peaceful and he was the one who comforted me instead and told me he was going home ahead of me and asked that I take good care of myself... Our love for each other had grown tremendously during his battle with the disease and I know i can never forget Paul and will continue to try to live well with God's Grace until we meet again...