105ians

It was exactly one year ago i last heard my dear hubby's loud and strong voice at 530am at gleneagles hospital. I can still remember i was woken up by his struggle for trying to get up from his bed. He was semi-conscious as the morphine and dormicum were running concurrently. I wanted to purge him so that he could sleep and wouldn't feel any pain and discomfort but he refused and wanted to talk to me instead. We chatted until 7am and i remember him asking me if he could go home first and whether i would be ok without him by my side. Though i knew i was very closed to losing him and it's good for God to take him home so that there wouldn't be any more sufferings but i couldn't control my tear. He wiped my tears with his warm hand and comforted me. I knew he was very ready to go home with the Lord and i just had to let him go peacefully. At 7am, he couldn't take the pain anymore. He gave me the last hug and asked me to purge the dormicum so that he could sleep and that was the last time he was awake........

I received a card from Dr Koo and the nurses from parkway cancer centre today and was very touched when i read some of the comments the nurses wrote about paul. Some of them remember paul's cheerful and fighting spirit. Their comforting words is very much appreciated.

Two more days will be my darling's 1st anniversary and it's very thoughtful of Pastor Chew for wanting to conduct a prayer at Paul's niche at 230pm. I miss paul dearly and no one can ever replace the vacuum he left in my life......