105ians

Paul requested to be heavily sedated yesterday morning as he doesn't want to experience the pain and discomfort anymore and he also asked all the doctors not to prolong his sufferings by giving him the nutrition as he told them he's ready to go home with the Lord.

Doctor had increased the dormicum dose and removed the nutrition yesterday afternoon since that's his wish. Today he's a totally different person. He is not able to stand on his own anymore as he's too weak now and he is slurring all the time. Even with the increase dose, he still woke up almost every 2 hr and i couldn't bear to purge the dormicum to let him sleep, i tried spending more time talking to him. Though he looked drowsy, i know he understands me as he kept giving me nice smiles.

He is so skinny now. It's so painful to see such a big-built and athletic person become so weak. I know God has been good to us in many ways and since He thinks it's better for paul to go home with Him now, let it be but if there's a miracle, then it will be the biggest bonus to us.

I would like to post some photos taken when he was still alert past few days.

(Finally managed to take with his surgeon, Dr Chan Hsiang Sui)

(with paul's mum, sister, brother-in-law, nieces and nephew)

(with my family)

(with son, ryan)

(with his mum)

There are many other photos taken with friends and relatives who visited him when he was sedated which i don't wish to post here as he looks too sick.

Well, we do not know when will God's will be done but we will continue to pray for peace and strength.